Friday, January 19, 2018

A Salad Bowl and Things in my Mother's House

Throughout my childhood the salad at any special occasion was served in a bowl shaped like a giant lettuce leaf, stamped "Made in Portugal" on the bottom.



And now that my mother has moved into an apartment at a retirement community and the children (there are four of us but it is mostly my sister and me) are taking things left behind in the house, the salad bowl is now in my own home, sitting atop the low bookcase Dan built in our little home office, visible to me every day. 

Unimaginable really that it should be in my house at all, so completely do I connect it with my parents, with their life together. It should be on the dining room table at 342 North Columbus Avenue in Mount Vernon, the room with the flocked velvet red and gold wallpaper, with my Aunt Rosie or Aunt Frances sitting in those ornate carved chairs my mother loved so well, chairs that none of us, we must confess, wanted, and are now in the hands of a consignor, waiting to be sold. Italian-Americans usually served the salad after the meal, right on the same plate from which they just eaten their macaroni or lasagna, the oil and red wine vinegar mixing with the gravy, which is what we always called tomato sauce until everyone got more Americanized. And that is how salad was served from this bowl, right onto the dinner plate, before coffee and dessert.

I told my mother I had taken the bowl. "Oh good," she said. (She is unfailingly pleased whenever we take something from her house. In her perfect world, every last chair, lamp, cup, napkin, tablecloth and plate would go to her children and grandchildren.) "Didn't you say you got it as an engagement or wedding gift?" I encourage her to remember. "Yes," she said, adding ruefully, "but I can't remember which." I press on. "And who gave it to you? " Not an Italian, right? It looks so Anglo," Anglo being an all-purpose term for anything un-Italian-American. No, my mother quickly agrees, not an Italian. "Didn't you tell me that Sherman Lichtman and his wife gave it to you and dad?" Dr. Lichtman was a Jewish dentist my Aunt Marie worked for as a dental hygienist, back when a hygienist was simply a young woman with a high school degree who learned on the job. But my mother is not sure, and the certain identity of the occasion and the giver, more than 60 years in the past, have in fact slipped away forever. 

My mother took good care of the bowl. Ceramics are notoriously vulnerable to chipping, yet the bowl has only a single tiny chip barely visible on its rim. I have not used it yet, can't bring myself to, not sure I will. So there it sits in my house, on top of the bookcase, between two glass vases and a stack of CDs, where it should, and and at the same time shouldn't, be.

2 comments:

  1. Nice piece...objects have a real power to evoke places and people. I can see my grandmother's frying pan hanging on the old knotty pine wall by her oven, and it brings back the distinctive smell of her kitchen. Yet it sits on our stovetop. Like you said, where it shouldn't--but should--be.

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  2. I love this Maria and for sure know how meaningful these objects are, letting us glimpse back into our past and all the things we remember from way back then...I'm glad you have it!

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